I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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