i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
So I just went to clothing optional bar
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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