dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
