you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
