Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize