two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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