I'll bet she douches with gravy.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
