I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
