I'm jealous of your bromance
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
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