ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
