so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize