I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
