Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i think i scared a bird with my dick
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
