i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Please don't give away my fajitas
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