what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize