having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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