Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize