Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
