love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
