You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
