Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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