i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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