and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
