yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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