1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
