It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
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