i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
