...so i touched it.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
