You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
