Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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