the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
