In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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