Grow some girl-balls and come out already
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
