You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
you had me at cake vodka
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
