Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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