sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
