he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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