Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
this boner is exhausting
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
