Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
