wanna go halves on a baby?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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