and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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