Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
