this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize