You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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