she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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