Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
