So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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