At least make sure they are 18
Why
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
