What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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