i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
